The BMW K1600GTL and the flower

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“We twist and turn our way to the bottom of its secret.” Do you like long walks on the beach, sensually stroking your lover’s sleek lines and the powerful feel of a huge…engine in your hand? Are you a sucker for men that read prose by candlelight? Then the BMW K1600GTL might be the right match for you. Here, it emotionally recounts the deep, powerful voyage the two of you will share.

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The only thing failing to rip our bodices while watching this video is the lack of a deep, gravelly, indisputably manly voice. BMW should have just thrown out the idea of pretending it wasn’t reading a page out of one of those Harlequin romance novels and plunked down for the deep, accented baritone of Mr. Sex-on-legs himself, Fabio. We hope they at least have the decency to hire him to pose for the cover when they serialize this story into paperback.

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  • MrPerformance

    It is just awful, but I did get a chub.

  • http://www.brammofan.com Brammofan

    “… to find yet another road, whose trail we pick up, heading ever deeper into new territory.”
    The BMW K1600GTL. Sleek. Powerful. Slutty. Ride one tonight, but don’t bother making plans for breakfast.

    • Scott

      Background video arriving with “new territory” seemingly features twin rows of barbed-wire atop a chain-link fence.
      Let’s go there!

  • http://www.muthalovin.com the_doctor

    Wes is now appearing on the covers of Harlequin romance novels for a little extra money.

  • http://twowheelsplus.blogspot.com/ andehans

    I’m constantly waiting for it to turn into an Old Spice ad.

    • http://www.thisblueheaven.com Mark D

      Look at the lake. Now look back at me. The bike is now diamonds.

  • slowestGSXRever

    Wow… I feel like if I got on that bike it would automatically take me to the nearest Lilith Fair. That’s awesome. And not awesome. But kinda Awesome. I just can’t quit you…

  • Liquidogged

    A seriously ugly motorcycle, now complete with silly ad. Hooray.

  • cityag

    Maybe it’s less fruity in Deutscher. More Rammstein-like.

  • http://bigassmessage.com/39b51 vic

    why does the front look so small not only in proportion with the(massive) front section but also the back wheel.and the seat looks low like the bike has forward controls(but it hasn’t)
    the rest of the bike looks ok for a road going tourer (from beemer) but those 2 thingg puzzle me
    burgman on roids

    • http://bigassmessage.com/39b51 vic

      LE:front wheel

  • Chuluun

    No, no, no, this isn’t my BMW fantasy at all. If I’m ever rich enough to own one I picture myself as the wayward scion of an oppressive aristocratic dynasty, galloping through villages on my charger and spraying the tubercular locals with road filth. This video needs less “I’m OK, You’re OK” and more “OUT OF MY WAY, PEASANTS!”

    This looks OK for a BMW tourer, but for sheer improbability it still doesn’t beat a Goldwing. Will anything, ever?

  • Kit

    Well damn, I think this is the best ad for the Concours, FJR, ST1300, and Goldwing ever!