‘Better than all the riding animals on earth’

TE-Lawrence

Before he was of Arabia, T.E. Lawrence was just an airman in the RAF, expressing the depression and squalor of military life post WWI in a series of articles that were later assembled into The Mint. One of those articles, “The Road” is perhaps the the most descriptive account of a fast motorcycle ride ever put down in words. Here it is. — Ed.

The extravagance in which my surplus emotion expressed itself lay on the road. So long as roads were tarred blue and straight; not hedged; and empty and dry, so long I was rich.

Nightly I’d run up from the hangar, upon the last stroke of work, spurring my tired feet to be nimble. The very movement refreshed them, after the day-long restraint of service. In five minutes my bed would be down, ready for the night: in four more I was in breeches and puttees, pulling on my gauntlets as I walked over to my bike, which lived in a garage-hut, opposite. Its tyres never wanted air, its engine had a habit of starting at second kick: a good habit, for only by frantic plunges upon the starting pedal could my puny weight force the engine over the seven atmospheres of its compression.

Boanerges’ first glad roar at being alive again nightly jarred the huts of Cadet College into life. ‘There he goes, the noisy bugger,’ someone would say enviously in every flight. It is part of an airman’s profession to be knowing with engines: and a thoroughbred engine is our undying satisfaction. The camp wore the virtue of my Brough like a flower in its cap. Tonight Tug and Dusty came to the step of our hut to see me off. ‘Running down to Smoke, perhaps?’ jeered Dusty; hitting at my regular game of London and back for tea on fine Wednesday afternoons.

Boa is a top-gear machine, as sweet in that as most single-cylinders in middle. I chug lordlily past the guard-room and through the speed limit at no more than sixteen. Round the bend, past the farm, and the way straightens. Now for it. The engine’s final development is fifty-two horse-power. A miracle that all this docile strength waits behind one tiny lever for the pleasure of my hand.

Another bend: and I have the honour of one of England’ straightest and fastest roads. The burble of my exhaust unwound like a long cord behind me. Soon my speed snapped it, and I heard only the cry of the wind which my battering head split and fended aside. The cry rose with my speed to a shriek: while the air’s coldness streamed like two jets of iced water into my dissolving eyes. I screwed them to slits, and focused my sight two hundred yards ahead of me on the empty mosaic of the tar’s gravelled undulations.

Like arrows the tiny flies pricked my cheeks: and sometimes a heavier body, some house-fly or beetle, would crash into face or lips like a spent bullet. A glance at the speedometer: seventy-eight. Boanerges is warming up. I pull the throttle right open, on the top of the slope, and we swoop flying across the dip, and up-down up-down the switchback beyond: the weighty machine launching itself like a projectile with a whirr of wheels into the air at the take-off of each rise, to land lurchingly with such a snatch of the driving chain as jerks my spine like a rictus.

Once we so fled across the evening light, with the yellow sun on my left, when a huge shadow roared just overhead. A Bristol Fighter, from Whitewash Villas, our neighbour aerodrome, was banking sharply round. I checked speed an instant to wave: and the slip-stream of my impetus snapped my arm and elbow astern, like a raised flail. The pilot pointed down the road towards Lincoln. I sat hard in the saddle, folded back my ears and went away after him, like a dog after a hare. Quickly we drew abreast, as the impulse of his dive to my level exhausted itself.

The next mile of road was rough. I braced my feet into the rests, thrust with my arms, and clenched my knees on the tank till its rubber grips goggled under my thighs. Over the first pot-hole Boanerges screamed in surprise, its mud-guard bottoming with a yawp upon the tyre. Through the plunges of the next ten seconds I clung on, wedging my gloved hand in the throttle lever so that no bump should close it and spoil our speed. Then the bicycle wrenched sideways into three long ruts: it swayed dizzily, wagging its tail for thirty awful yards. Out came the clutch, the engine raced freely: Boa checked and straightened his head with a shake, as a Brough should.

The bad ground was passed and on the new road our flight became birdlike. My head was blown out with air so that my ears had failed and we seemed to whirl soundlessly between the sun-gilt stubble fields. I dared, on a rise, to slow imperceptibly and glance sideways into the sky. There the Bif was, two hundred yards and more back. Play with the fellow? Why not? I slowed to ninety: signalled with my hand for him to overtake. Slowed ten more: sat up. Over he rattled. His passenger, a helmeted and goggled grin, hung out of the cock-pit to pass me the ‘Up yer’ Raf randy greeting.

They were hoping I was a flash in the pan, giving them best. Open went my throttle again. Boa crept level, fifty feet below: held them: sailed ahead into the clean and lonely country. An approaching car pulled nearly into its ditch at the sight of our race. The Bif was zooming among the trees and telegraph poles, with my scurrying spot only eighty yards ahead. I gained though, gained steadily: was perhaps five miles an hour the faster. Down went my left hand to give the engine two extra dollops of oil, for fear that something was running hot: but an overhead Jap twin, super-tuned like this one, would carry on to the moon and back, unfaltering.

We drew near the settlement. A long mile before the first houses I closed down and coasted to the cross-roads by the hospital. Bif caught up, banked, climbed and turned for home, waving to me as long as he was in sight. Fourteen miles from camp, we are, here: and fifteen minutes since I left Tug and Dusty at the hut door.

I let in the clutch again, and eased Boanerges down the hill along the tram-lines through the dirty streets and up-hill to the aloof cathedral, where it stood in frigid perfection above the cowering close. No message of mercy in Lincoln. Our God is a jealous God: and man’s very best offering will fall disdainfully short of worthiness, in the sight of Saint Hugh and his angels.

Remigius, earthy old Remigius, looks with more charity on and Boanerges. I stabled the steel magnificence of strength and speed at his west door and went in: to find the organist practising something slow and rhythmical, like a multiplication table in notes on the organ. The fretted, unsatisfying and unsatisfied lace-work of choir screen and spandrels drank in the main sound. Its surplus spilled thoughtfully into my ears.

By then my belly had forgotten its lunch, my eyes smarted and streamed. Out again, to sluice my head under the White Hart’s yard-pump. A cup of real chocolate and a muffin at the teashop: and Boa and I took the Newark road for the last hour of daylight. He ambles at forty-five and when roaring his utmost, surpasses the hundred. A skittish motor-bike with a touch of blood in it is better than all the riding animals on earth, because of its logical extension of our faculties, and the hint, the provocation, to excess conferred by its honeyed untiring smoothness. Because Boa loves me, he gives me five more miles of speed than a stranger would get from him.

At Nottingham I added sausages from my wholesaler to the bacon which I’d bought at Lincoln: bacon so nicely sliced that each rasher meant a penny. The solid pannier-bags behind the saddle took all this and at my next stop a (farm) took also a felt-hammocked box of fifteen eggs. Home by Sleaford, our squalid, purse-proud, local village. Its butcher had six penn’orth of dripping ready for me. For months have I been making my evening round a marketing, twice a week, riding a hundred miles for the joy of it and picking up the best food cheapest, over half the country side.


Copyright on this article, The Mint and many other works by T. E. Lawrence recently expired. You can, and should, read the full text of The Mint here.

  • Roman

    Fantastic way to end the week, thank you! This is why I put up with countless stories of Wes bragging about how much ass he gets and Sean’s 10,000 word treaties on lane splitting. Keep up the good work guys!

    • http://www.twitter.com/wessilerfanclub the (unfortunate) roomate

      no, this comment is a fnatastic way to end the week. well done sir.

      • JonB

        +1

        • http://hellforleathermagazine.com Wes Siler

          +2

          • http://www.xenophya.com Xenophya

            +3

            • Kirill

              +4

              • Dumptruckfoxtrot

                +5

                • http://mansgottado.tumblr.com/ gregorbean

                  +6

                • Roman

                  Stop it, yous guys are making me blush…

  • jason McCrash

    Anytime Lawrence of Arabia is on I watch the first few minutes (after the friggin overture) just for the scene of him riding and crashing. Great sound editing and cinamatography. If some assholes had listened to T.E.L. the middle east wouldn’t be such a fuckhole now.

    • DoctorNine

      Don’t worry. The Egyptians are going to fix things there eventually. They might have been sleeping for a couple hundred years. But these are peoples with an imagination which spans millenia.

      • jason McCrash

        I’m ecstatic about the “revolutions” in the middle east. I was talking about the idiotic way the area was divided post World War 1, ignoring tribal regions and inventing kingdoms and royal families. Iraq never should’ve existed, it should’ve been part of Syria, Iran and Turkey. TE was a supporter of a Pan-Arabian “nation”. Sadly, when you look at the entire world and it’s issues for the last 90+ years it is the result of WW1. Everything from Ireland to the Balkans to Africa from top to bottom to Afghanistan and the Soviet Union are all results of the arrogant tools that chopped up the planet during the Paris peace talks. We have been at war as a country non-stop since before 1917. Central America, Philippines, WW1, Russia, China, WW2, the Cold War (yes, there was a lot of fighting during the cold war, sadly most American’s are unaware of it), Korea, Vietnam, Central America again, Beirut, Grenada, Panama, Gulf 1, Iraq no fly zones, Bosnia, Afghanistan, Iraq, Libya…….. that’s a lot of time and effort put into resolving the fuckups made after the Great War. (I am a military history nerd and veteran, sorry).

  • T Diver

    Probably one of my favorite movies ever. Too bad he got pounded by the Turks in that prison. I think that did him in. Seven Pillars right?

  • Sean Smith

    Back then, the fastest production bike in the world went 105 and had hard bags, there were no helmets and oiling was done by hand.

    Then again, I’m fairly certain that my bike will go a few clicks faster with me on board than a stranger, street racing with friendly strangers is still awesome and my excuse to do the 300+ mile ride through Ojai at a million mph is pistachios straight from the farm.

  • Archer

    Boanerges is actually a lovely name for a bike… Means Son of Thunder.

    • Scott-jay

      Here’s a different take: “a surname given by Jesus to James and John. Mark 3:17″

      Title’s quote concisely continues, “.. because of its logical extension of our faculties, and the hint, the provocation, to excess…”

      • Archer

        Yes, and it’s because they were such fiery orators/preachers- so, no, not a different take at all.

  • smoke4ndmears

    This passage will never get old to me. It’s a reminder that even the most routine ride on a motorcycle is something special and poetic.

  • John

    Epic!

  • dux

    Try writing that about a Mazda 3, Wired commentors.

    • Jonny

      Well said, chap.

    • http://twitter.com/metabomber Jesse

      I would bronze this if I could.

  • Ola

    Peter Fonda and Dennis Hopper?

    No.

    T.E. Lawrence and Hunter S. Thompson.

    • http://hellforleathermagazine.com Wes Siler

      Yep.

      • JT Nesbitt

        “jerks my spine like a rictus.” Wow! It’s like Song Of The Sausage Creature put through the Shakespeare filter. Hoons in pantaloons! — JT

        • contender

          I’ve got the Sausage Creature article matted and hanging in my living room. This may get the same treatment.

    • RpM

      Funny-the same thing ran through my mind!

  • oldblue

    A great read.

  • jon

    now *that’s* the way to get your breakfast

  • je

    I read this as its almost noon, all my blinds are shut so its dark in my house, I have 6 motorcycles in the garage and im sitting in my boxers. I think its time to meet the sun and enjoy then wind in my hair.

    Thanks for the motivation…

    • Scott-jay

      Virtual motorcycling takes up too much of my time, too.

  • noone1569

    sigh. What a proper way to end my week.

    A week of my bike being down.

    A week of rebuilding to top end of another bike.

    A week of failing in said rebuild.

    Mr. Lawrence gives me hope. Next week shall redeem.

    • http://twitter.com/metabomber Jesse

      Redemption finds those that Do Work.
      Go forth and kick ass.

  • http://www.ninja250blog.com R.Sallee (Ninja 250)

    That’s some inspirin’ shit right there.

  • Filipe
  • Stephen Salton

    His bike was a Brough Superior ss100.
    One of the first ever superbikes.
    He owned 8 of them, eventually.
    He died riding one in 1935.
    He swerved to avoid two boys on bicycles and was thrown over the handlebars, suffering terrible head injuries.
    The neurosurgeon who treated him later went on to conduct a study on motorcycle safety, and his research led to the use of motorcycle helmets by the military and eventually by civilians.
    Think about that the next time you put your helmet on.