Deth Killers Do Girls

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By

deer

“This is our version of a Pirelli calendar,” explains our buddy Kate. That’s right, everyone’s favorite biker-gang-fashion-brand has discovered the golden rule of advertising: sex sells. But where in Bushwick can you find such nice, young ladies? What do they have to do with abrasion-resistant denim? And did they save any for us? We sat down with Deth Killers head honcho Greg Minnig to find out.

NSFW

Us: Why does DK use women for its site if it doesn’t make women’s gear?
Him: We did some market research and it turns out our focus group-selected demographic market likes clevage.

Us: You guys sexist or something?
Him:Ya we are totally sexy!

Us: Where did you find the ladies?
Him:We found them on the space shuttle. This one time. The space shuttle, that is where we go to meet ladies.

Us: How much did they get?
Him: For tax purposes I can not explain the prices.

Us: How many of the girls have given Greg a lap dance?
Him: Lap dances are for strippers, these girls ride the space shuttle. Strippers do not ride the space shuttle or at least not anymore.

Us: Is that bath full of milk?
Him: Yes, tiger milk. That is the best kind of milk you know.

Us: Why not just use coke addicted 13 year old Eastern Europeans?
Him: This is something we were not aware of, but we will keep that in mind for next time. Can you tell us how to get to the country of Eastern Europe? They are good riding there?


Greg’s animal magnetism is palpable. This is actually how he cleans himself; the gun show scares the dirt away.

Us: If someone wanted to get sexy like Greg, how would they go about that?
Him:They only need wear our new fragrance for men: Nightmare Sex, it is the combination of Drakkar Noir and danger. Available soon.

Us: Do any of these girls ride?
Him: What do you mean? They ride the space shuttle. It is like you are not listening or something.

Us: Who killed the deer?
Him: Explosion Robinson. He was a record store with a lightening bolt.

Us: How can I be the next Deth Killer Girl?
Him: Check our website for an application to apply. You should be pretty or awesome or pretty awesome.

Us: From where comes all your awesome ideas, not just the clothing, but also the smart ones?
Him:Sometimes they come from in outter space. Sometimes they come from Pumps.

Us: Pumps, what is pumps?
Him:Funny you should ask, have you been?

Us: No, is it a person?
Him:It is the place in Bushwick that belongs to everybody.

Us: Can I ask you another question?
Him:No, thank you, it is really nice we have to go do wheelies now.

This is just a small select from the shoot that appears on the Deth Killers site. Refresh their page to see them all.

  • http://www.anotherdamndj.com evilbahumut

    man, that girl is albiiiiino. ♥ly

  • Vincent

    Why’s Axle Rose in the pic with the dear?

    • Miles Prower [690 Duke, MTS 1200]

      LOL!

  • http://www.muthalovin.com the_doctor

    It is a shame the space shuttle got the decomish. No more space shuttle girls.

  • http://pinkyracer.com pinkyracer

    I’m more than pretty awesome. Does this mean their jeans will finally fucking be in Barney’s again? I don’t care if they’re made for men, I have magical powers to make all clothes right and sexy for ladies. Especially jeans. I’m sick and tired of risking the utter destruction of my awesome 34″ legs in substandard denim.

  • ktaisa

    dat bomb shit

    they have an online store now so no need to have barneys mark it up

    wayy cheaper

    • http://pinkyracer.com pinkyracer

      cool. yeah, I’m kind of a tool like that. I like to try shit on, even though I end up altering everything. Those pants are coming out of my next paycheck…

  • Paul

    Nice looking jeans. Too bad they don’t make ‘em for guys with a bit of meat on their bones (i.e. me).

    • http://dethkillers.com megadethkiller

      werkin on it, next season!

      • Paul

        Great!

      • http://hellforleathermagazine.com Wes Siler

        Ashphalt resistant Muumuus?

  • zipp4

    Is this a joke or something? Wes, I’m pretty sure he was just making fun of you the whole time, either that or he’s on coke.

    That being said, thanks for the sweet titties.

    • http://dethkillers.com megadethkiller

      hell no! double no!

    • http://dethkillers.com megadethkiller

      why would we make fun of Wes when there are so many better things to make fun of???

    • http://pinkyracer.com pinkyracer

      It’s not a joke, it’s called imagination. We’re sorry that TV annihilated yours.

  • JTourismo

    Not entirely sure what just happened, but I kind of like it. Thanks for the entertainment; E.g., ladies, guns, minibikes, and space talk.

  • jason

    Greg sounds Russian.

    • http://hellforleathermagazine.com Grant Ray

      Nah, that’s just from hanging out too long in Brighton chasing those Cosmonaut girls fresh off the boat.

  • The other Joe

    Sweet titties!!!

  • http://www.pedalgents.com holdingfast

    i didnt see one pair of jeans there.. but maybe i was staring at the chicks.
    ladies or not, i shall pick up a pair next time im in NY – i do ride in jeans a lot even tho we all know its no good.

  • Stephen

    I got T-Boned by a car while wearing Deth Killers jeans. I slid either up the street about 40 feet and had no road rash. If I had titties, I bet the jeans would have protected them because Deth Killers love titties…megatitties, too.

  • Knife

    No boner material there.

  • zero

    So, I understand the whole calendar thing, and I do love titties and will check it out after work.

    That said, I wish their main site didn’t have titties on the front page…and that I didn’t open it at work…within sight of my boss.

    • http://twitter.com/metabomber Jesse

      SFX: SAD TROMBONE

      Hopefully your boss has a sense of humour about clothes clearly made to keep your hide intact, so you are safer when going to work.

      …Do you think he bought it?

  • 1198freak

    Knife is right, no real boner material here.

    • T Diver

      1198, you must only go for those high-end Italian tits.

  • Gene

    Oh that reminds me, I need to re-up on Suicide Girls….

  • http://twitter.com/metabomber Jesse

    Timing is perfect.

    Here I was looking to drop some cash on some good looking jeans I could wear to work.

    Problem solved, order submitted. Thanks.

  • Brede Howard

    whats the return/exchange policy?!

  • Myles

    I grabbed a pair last summer, and they have been the best damn pair of pants. They’ve worn extremely well, and grew to be comfortable both off and on the bike.

    The chiX also apparently love them, they’ve already made up about 75% of my lifetime “nice jeans” compliments.

  • BigRooster

    Just saw one of the models on a 20/20 episode about albinos. No mention of HFL.

  • http://sorrgrsybc.jimdo.com/ cheap north face

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