Team RideApart Wins at Velvets MC Panty Drive!
Maybe you saw the post on May 10th about the Velvets MC charity benefit for the Downtown Women's Shelter, and maybe you were even there last weekend. But did you know when the final numbers were added up Team RideApart took home the big prize? Specifically, myself (Woody), Colonel Jim Downs of the Union Army Cavalry (retired), and our trusty scout Sasha won the mechanical bull riding contest, though I think it was mostly Sasha's ride that did it.
We had set out to make a good showing in front of all those L.A. motorcycle scenesters, but when the bull malfunctioned and blew several fuses early in the evening, things did not look good. Our strategy had been to drink just enough Pabst Blue Ribbon before riding to loosen us up, but not so much that we would get sloppy —basically the same gambit you use when bowling or playing pool. After the hour long delay getting the beast going again, we were all getting dangerously close to a "fall off and don't care" level of drunk. Luckily, just as the assembled DIY community was getting ready to hotwire the rented contraption, the owners showed up and set it back to rights.
Jim Downs lead the charge (as you would expect from a cavalry officer). He vaulted onto the bull, took one last swig of the rye in his hip flask, and tossed it nonchalantly over his shoulder to me, waiting in the wings. Jim made a good showing of it, and you can tell he spends a lot of time on off-road bikes by the way he was able to hang on as the bull tried to buck him off.
Obviously, this was not Jim's first rodeo. But it sure was mine. I didn't leap, hop or vault onto the bull. In fact, it took me two tries to get up on it. It didn't go very well from there. The rules stipulate you can only hold on with one hand (I suspect this is so you can hold onto your hat with the other). At about 15 seconds in to my ride, I thought to myself: "I'm not left handed, I should be holding on with the other hand," and promptly fell off. Jim had my phone, so you all get video of this one:
Now it all came down to Sasha: That little lady managed to stay on top of the bucking bull for what seemed like five minutes (101 seconds officially), and it didn't go easy on her either. It's a testament to the concepts of inertia and concentration of mass that this petite woman was able to hold on for so long when larger men — with (ostensibly) stronger arms — got thrown off in less than a minute.
I'm fairly certain that it was our spectacular showing in this event that lead to the recent acquisition of RideApart by Motor1.
All in all, it was a good time for a good cause. Thousands of dollars were raised for the women's shelter and hundreds of pairs of panties were donated. Unfortunately, one less pair than maybe should have gone to charity though. During the unscheduled intermission, when the bull took a nap, the MC for some reason stripped down, put on a pair of woman's panties, and started challenging other guys to arm wrestle. Unfortunately, I didn't get a picture of this, but just imagine Joe Dirt in red panties and a cowboy hat, and you pretty much got it.
Thanks so much to the Velvets MC, and Lucky Wheels DIY membership workshop for putting on such a great event. Hopefully this will become an annual tradition on the L.A. motorcycle calendar, and we can defend our title next year. 'Til then, the trophy goes on the shelf at RideApart HQ right next to Jim's recent AHRMA awards.
(Second image of Jim by Jenna Stellar)